News from the Northwest

Last evening as Tiffany and I attended a small schindig sponsored by some of eric's school mates, something was brought to my attention that requires at least four or five minutes of my precious, precious time. The news I received brought shame to my heart, tears to my eyes, and anger to my soul (if I had one). What once was found is now lost again, much to my dismay boywonder has given up, forfeited, thrown in the proverbial towel and hung up his gloves. Who gives up on Washington one might ask? More importantly, who could give up on Nate? Grant, do you have any idea what you have done. The universe was properly aligned, all members of the shitizens were more or less doing what they should be, although Eric might disagree with this. If it were up to Eric you would be homeless and infected with leprosy. But your life is not in Eric control, it is in mine. So the question is, what will I do with your life? There was talk of passing you around our various houses and keeping you on as a maid or some kind of nanny for Colton, but that is not going to teach you the kind of harsh life lessons that a man of your age needs to be taught. No I think that we should leave your life's path in the hands of the shitizens as a hole [sic]. All kidding aside grant, your return will call for ruckus and outlandish behavior on all of our parts, but I will still be obligated to squish my lips together and give you half-hearted head shake before we can stick our tongues down each other's throats. Good riddance you fuckin cunt.

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