Refuse to be stopped!

(Day 1)
Summer break is past. Get up, and get your boots on. We're going to hike a long ways today, and I don't want you to hold us up anymore. We're going to head into the woods and it's dark and dank and dirty and we don't have any more bug spray, so get your head up and know that we're going to make it through. Yes, all the way, yes, we're going to march all the way through today and we're going to sleep on the other side. And no, I don't know how big the woods are, I don't know what's on the other side. If there is no other side? Then we'll die of exhaustion, but I'm not sleeping in these creepy woods and we have nowhere else to go. Do you see a road? Or a house or chimney smoke? Do you have an extra set of corncobs stuffed inside your abs? Then you're going to listen to me and I'm taking us inside the woods.

(Day 4)
Stop crying! Stop it, will you! I'm starving to death! The woods are beckoning! I saw a deer or a moose or something, I saw walking meat, I saw living things that could be eaten, they could give us the strength to continue! Oh, their might be some mist, but that doesn't mean it's mysterious, it means there is probably a source of water or something nearby! I am dying! I am a dying man because you are too meaty to move and now I'm going to die and you'll eat me, that's your plan isn't it, to eat me when I'm dead! If you do, you'll be sorry, you bull of a man, I poisoned my marrow before we left, because I just knew this was going to happen, I knew you'd fall down and hurt yourself like a liar and complain about your ugly swollen varicose steroid corpuscled ankles, because I knew you were a coward and now poison has filled my muscles! Oh god, I ache so much, like every sinew was tweezed off my tendons, like my thighs are sitting in one of those trash compactors I've read about in magazines, like my bones are shriveling inside my body while my meat stays the same size, like my whole life was led full of lies, mortal lies about my bank account and my status, lies to women I knew and to women I didn't, lies to my bosses and my priests and my parole officers, lies to the bartenders who loved me and made love to me when no one was looking, on tuesday and wednesday mornings when they'd open up early, just for me! That's the pain I chose rather than feed you for an instant from my body because I wanted you to die too, so I beg you, when I fall asleep for good, as the shock blankets me in painless quivering, eat me! Eat me you sweaty macho cannibal, eat me!

(Day 9)
I'm going to die if I don't go in the woods. I don't need your protection anymore, you're no good to me. What kind of muscleman collapses from exhaustion! You meathead! Give me a break, I'm leaving, for the woods and I hope when I get back you're going to be dead! Hah!

(Day 18)
Hah! I've returned and I have meat! And you're skinny, aren't you, completely devolved. Your cheeks are sunken and your eyes look gray and removable. I'm going to try. Ooh, you grunted ! You're even still alive and your eyeballs are stuck in there real good. But you're still dying! You're so ugly right now, I knew, I always knew that underneath your layers and your muscles was an ugly person to match your ugly stupid brain and your ugly personality. Hah! I can't believe you're dying before me! That you were too scared to go into the woods, crying and begging me to stay and die here with you, be just like you. I want to die! I want to sit and moan and moan and frost the tips of my hair! Too bad you can't dye that bald spot, too bad you can't bench press away that acne, too bad you can snatch yourself out of that wheelchair! I hate you! I hate you!

(Day 100)
I'm back you idiot! I'm back because they made me king of the Forest! Inside there, beyond those trees, I have an army and women and out here you're alone and rotting. You are so skinny, like a skeleton! Hah! And I knew your eyes could come out, you just had to pop them! I should have thought of that, but the maggots knew, the maggots are smart and resourceful! I should have to ask them to join me, in the forest, to anoint me their king! I just wanted to pop in and say hello! And I hate you! I hope hell has a pull-up bar!

(Day 103)
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I was lying and now I'm too hungry to go back. Give me a drink from your canteen? Please? I'm sorry. I just wanted to be beautiful and a king and I thought you could help me. I'm sorry. Can I please have a drink? I think I'm dying too. Please don't let me die. I'm all you have in the whole world, you selfish beefy punk, please, give me something to drink! I need something to drink! I am going to die!

(Day 104)

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